this ones fr u mom...

before i was me you made me , me..
before things nevr went wrong
and life was glee..

every step u took
every thought of yours..
nurtured my body and my soul
and its only because of you mom
that i can stand on my own,...

there were times when
no one was around,
but then in a blink
i turned to you and all my worries
were parried..

when i remember fightng the red hot fever
the only soothing and cooling effect
was that of your palms..
caressing my forehead n relieving me from pain..

you always stood by me as my pillar of strength..
supporting , scolding , loving
all as n wen required..
to see u happy i strive so hard..
to win all the pride, i aim apart..

mom, the moment wen i see the spark in your eyes
it drives me wild
to work harder n harder..
and achieve all that you have ever wanted for me...

never in my life will i let you down..
to see you content
i will go places far and wide..
you wish fr anything and dat will be yours...
to achieve all this .. all i need is you..!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OHH... this is LIFE..!!!!

this is the poetry written by me in december 2005.. one of my first creations..

This evening i passed a lane
Saw a woman groaning with pain..
she stared up, hoping for aid
but to her , no heed i paid
I felt pity for a short while..
then continued on my way on the aisle..
Later that evening my mind forced me to wonder..
it was the beautiful yet withered face to which i surrender
The face though still groaned with pain
Looked at me still so serene.

I beckoned to her in my thoughts ,
to hear a reply, with her i fought..
Then I hear a murmuring sound
hearing life coming out of her so profound..
As if to distract me the doorbell rang
And through the up i sprang..
The agony stricken face crossed my eyes,
and I concluded life is full whys..

A few days later i saw her again,
beauty still there but no more pain..
her face was as lifeless as it could be,
one of the person responsible was definitely me..
They carried her body through the buzzing street,
and as they passed i touched her feet..
She had become quiet forever....

But the chirpings of the birds never stopped
wind still paved its way with a husking sound,
the dog at the street side continued to bark..
But she was not there
her absence and tranquility still lingering in the air..
Ohh !!! this is LIFE..
So many people come and go..
but does nature ever deviate...??? NO
full of struggles , full of pain..
filled with glories and some gain..
So my dear friends learn to live and strive,
Because you will have it just once - LIFE..!!!!
Ohh !!! this is LIFE..

long lost....................... MIND

this ones gonna be fun writing... coz again i was reminded that ohh goshh!!!!!!!!!! im so damn absent minded.. quite well known among frns for doin something "gadbad" ... dropping things within a blink has become a part of my daily chores.. " good to see , good to hold , but once broken we considered it sold" u wont believe , even i cudnt but the era of visual merchandising wrote it for me actually... :) :)lollzzz.... evrytime i hv something to tell my sister ... aftr listening and laughing as if she has ever laughed, she still adds"say something new"..:):) well this is not something new for them who know me... for otherss..enjoy.!!!

6 P.M in the evening, Destination was Esplanade Metro Station but hold ... how come i see the ferry.. ohh its not the ferry, its the ship ride offered at the Millenium Park, gleaming beyond the trees n innumerable children... dats becoz my bus stop passed by long time bak... In haste i got down from the bus and stared .. cudnt even pass on the blame to the conductor coz i was already standing on a busy road . cudnt think of nethng else but save my life.. horrified at alomost evrything , i crossed the road.. n strtd walking.. but very soon i was in a world where all the horn banging in the world seemed like some A.R.Rehman music.. the only visible object then was the MOON which even two days aftr "poornima" glistened .. eyes could not be taken off it...EXQUISITE.. the soothing yet unruly air flurried thru my hair.. giving it sm kin of RGV camp look..(im sure!!!!!)

ohh goshh.... "dhormotola dhormotolaa..." was i listening to some bengali song... no.. it was a person from inside the bus yelling his lungs out..!!! hey i had to go bak home n the place where i was standing- i dint have an inkling how to get bak home from there......... so before the bengali song cud get over i had get upon the bus n reach the metro station.. coz "dhormotola" was the only being i was aquainted with...
by the way im no Love Fanatic staring at the moon.. its jus my aesthetic sense and the serenity associated with(definitely) the moon that mesmerises me...

cheers Sweta..

Life After Death...

this is one topic on which many wise men have spoken and interpreted in their own manner.. but yesterday i saw a completely new and different understanding of this intriguing theme..

have u ever wondered what happens when a person dies.. ?? i am sure u must have ... coz at some point or the other we all have faced this harshest truth of life.. newaz cumin bak to wat i saw yestrday.. It was a movie which gave an entirely new meaning to this topic although it did not mean to... basically its the way i comprehended it.. It was about a not so happily married couple .. very soon after the marriage the husband died becoz of brain tumour.. The wife was completely hysteric ... she had lost hope from life..she constantly called her husband's phone jus to listen to his pre-recorded message on the voicemail..She sang and danced alone.. Then suddenly one fine morning on her Birthday a cake along with a recorded tape wz left at her doorstep.. and to evrybody's surprise.. it was from her husband-"jerry" she constantly enquired jerry's best friend.. but he jus like evrybdy else was completely taken aback...He had no clue either.. The recorded voice said that Holly"his wife " would be receiving letters from him evryday and they would certainly improve her condition.. she had turned Insane while halucinating her husband's presence...

and since then she received letters evryday fr a very long period of time directing her to go and enjoy life and not jus brood over his death.. he had also planned a trip for her amidst the valleys of Ireland.. evrything was jus so perfect.. evryhwhere she went she could feel his presence- which definitely was the result of the eternal love they still shared.. what i felt that person wanted to live his life so much that even aftr when GOD gave him death he still lived.. He was very much aware that he ws to die soon so he had preplanned evrything for his wife.. ordered stuffs to be delivered at different times of the year.. HE lived his life after death through his wife... n he LIVED... But jus as life before death comes to an end , so did his Life after death.. the letters got exhausted n so did the tapes... but till then his wife had found n given a new meaning to her life... all the letters had the following footnote...
"P.S - I Love You..." (name of the movie..)


cheers Sweta.!!!!

jus anoder one..!!!!

Every time i am close to knowing my self,i realise i m stilll at too far to reach the inner me...might sound too incomprehenedeble but i ges dats wat i am still configuring and analysin myself.....maybe dats the reason y im nt able to gel very wel.. once u ask a person abt me n he wud whole heartedly tell you that she is a talkative person who cn go on blabbering etc etc(which might gv u positive thots abt me).But maybe the vry next person sitting rite next to him might be of the opinion that i am jus too weird.. well this isnt jus in my case fr dat matter coz opinions do vary... so no issues wid dat..!!!! I can say all this becoz there was one point of time in my life when i could proclaim that yes i have what wat i want... maybe that was too early a stage but pertaining to the demands and supply graph of then i actually had what i wanted.. Each and evry individual comes across that phase in their lives . N this happens until we r in our secure shells ie, Our Home sweet Home..
Only once we step out of it , do our demands increase.. by demand i refer to wat we demand from life and our surroundings... n not our demand in general.. So wen bannnggg goes the demand curve, the insatiation goes high too... n that is the moment when this Big Bad World says... "WELCOME".!!

Yes so with time and experence we do learn loads n loads of new stuffs, we meet variety of ppl...
BY variety i sincerely mean variety.. i nevr knew God was actually so good in making every individual so unique in his own fashion.. I dont know y i am writing this.. but yes i know.. I miss my frnzz , i Know that to earn certaing thigs in life i had almost lost one of the most precious gift from the almighty.. but he has been too kind to me.. (thank u so muchh..!!!!)

There are certain people in life who take control of u n kin of help u shape up as a human being .
But then there are moments when u realise, that hello.. its me n my life !!!!!!!!! so wat happens is u end up losing those people who mattered the most to u..!!!! n y i am writing this coz sometimes i feel that i have distanced so much from some ppl... that thr duznt seem to be any way that i can get bak to them... n factors adding to this traumatic feeling are some of the biggest human evils- EGO, EGO, EGO....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
if u too r bitten by the same devillish syndrome get rid of it as soon as possible...!!!!

cheers Sweta..!!!!

mean world...

it ws saturday afternoon and i was returning from ISI..nothing very different on dat day just that i was retrning a little early..got upon the bus n not much to my astonishment stumbled at the steps..
so u see..everything was the same..with earphones plugged in i got comfortably into a vacant seat in the ladies section but then i noticed something..Generally wen i get into a public place i behave as if i some kind of princess and dont even bother to look around at people..bt then tht moment was different..no not at all dont think that i found my prince charming sitting rite across me dats not possible...neither did i saw a pretty gal whose looks i could envy and it ws definitely nt my favrt superstar frm the land of bollywood..then what was it that drew my attention??...there was this man in his forties and his wife...talking to each other and completely lost in their conversation..then wats so dammn diffrent in it.every other couple is....dat is wat evn i wondered n then i realised that there was so much love which wasnt expressed through mere words but signs and actions..probably god did not want them to make such a beautiful feeling, expresssable in words , or rather anything for that matter..yes i think you have understood wat i am trying to say...the couple was deaf and dumb but still one of the most comfrtable and good luking couple..so i looked at them trying hard to make out the actions bt cudnt decrypt a single move..n then i quit !!! the crowd in the bus kept increasing but i enjoyed my privilege of being a lady(lollzz..)..then another couple got into a bus..("no i wsnt doin couple watching sitting inside the bus") he too in his forties perhaps.. n then he asked the other man, sitting next to his wife to vacate d seat as it ws a ladies section..n to his surprise the man dint respond .. hw wud he??..aftr all...!!!
sooner the man realised the person he ws persuading to do something was actually a disabled or "specially abled" as i wud prefer to call..n then he showed his real colours..he called out to the conductor and started ridiculing that poor soul ... that ws the moment wen i lost it and just felt like breaking all shackles and go and defend my specially abled...but then i jus cudnt..god knows why..???? and then the obvious happened the conductor somehow managed to shift that person to some other seat and leaving behind that grinning pig..(i ges tht is wat i wud like to refer to him..) u cud substitute it the way u want it..and then there was d social helplessness which i felt strongly..and many more resentments attached i got down at my bus stop and then moving on with my so damned life..which wud jus remaen centralised arnd myself without being able to do sometthing for people i wish for.."so desperately.."


cheers Sweta!!!!

dint know i cud write...(plz comment)

So on the eve of bijoya dashami when i sit back and think of the great times i had during the pujas, the only images that come to my mind are the highly crowded streets of kolkata, strolled by its natives who take pride in visting the pandals and taking blessings from Maa Durga...Being born and brought up in kolkata has instilled this attachment wid this festival.. and being a resident in the neighbourhoods of kumhartuli , since childhood i have seen thousand of idols passing by loaded on huge trucks. Kumhartuli - the only potter town of India is quite well known to the extent that channels like discovery have made documentaries on the same... every year idols are exported to India and even overseas from this place...i think enough of providing my detailed attachment to the festival lemme continue with my perception of the festival.. i wont say that i am an impulsive pandal hopper and that the very thought of experiencing wild crowd brings goosebumps.. i always want to cherish such outings with family so i dont overdo it.. but amidst all the hustle when u finally manage to reach your destination the only image that remains imprinted on your mind is the beauty and serenity on Maa Durga's face even when she is killing mahisasur.. adorned by exquisite artistry n craftsmenship are the pandals which are result of months long hardships and creativity that take full bloom one week prior to the festival... and then another in moving clip crosses my mind..no its not the beutifully lighted streets , neither is it the overly dressed people ... its the cadets , bsf officers, kolkata metro railway employees, traffic police yes these are the people i am thinkin of rite now... at such moments wen i can sit bak n think of the festivities these people cant even do that... how could they have it after all..??? were not they busy providing high level security to us so that we can have an awesome time...??? yes these are the people we dont even think about , but the fact is its becoz of them that we have had a blissful puja... the series of blasts were actually responsible that led to such strict security in cal.... newaz... this was little insight or a sneek peek into my world n perceptions..hopefully will be updating my blogs more often now.. n a piece of info .. that this was my frst blog since registered on blogspot .. it wsnt meant fr u to like it or dislike it.. it was jus a vent to my feelings.. unlike my personal diary where there are no intruders...(lollzzz..!!!)
cheers Sweta...!!!